I was reflecting on 2006. It wasn't a great year for me. Don't get me wrong, there were good things. Top highlights: Getting engaged, going to London by myself for a week, putting up my tree for X-mas, quitting the totalitarian dictatorship known as the Citadel. But I felt a lot of disappointment and dispair. My year started with a friend dumping me for an unknown reason around X-mas. No explanation, no anything. It really put me down for 2 or 3 months. I'm still really hurt and confused, but it's a lot less. I hope my friend is well and I hope that we can reconnect eventually.
I had to disconnect from a terrible person, who insulted my friends and my boyfriend. I'm not good at dumping, so I just kind of stopped calling and e-mailing. She sent me an e-mail that I recieved while I was in England on my vacation, she also CC'd it to my parents. I don't know what she thought that would do. But that's okay, she has her fake relationship with her internet "boyfriend" to keep her warm. He's a beer geek.
I worked an awful lot. Too much. I let myself go to the workaholic place that makes me cranky and unreasonable. I was also working in a place where I was unnappreciated. This led me to quit when I didn't get a job that I was doing in absence of anyone else doing it after being thanked for "taking up the slack", but my "leadership skills" (read: ass kissing skills) weren't up to snuff, but I was "a valuable part of the team". Three years of my life blood and that's the thanks I get. 6 weeks of waiting to be told they didn't want me to be anything more than a peon. I'm still mad, that's gonna take some time to get over. I'm mad, but I'm also not stupid. Quitting was the best thing I did for myself.
I continually feel frustrated as a performer. I work and audition and yet I'm still stuck in the chorus, in community theatre, or being completely ignored. Feeling like a talentless slug when you know you are just as or more qualified than the people you see really sucks. I think that taking a break is a good thing in this area. Maybe not being seen is a good thing for a little while.
But Here's what's good before 2007 even starts, and what will only get better....
1) New Job! I will get to leave the annoying co-"worker" behind. (I have to use the word work lightly around her.)
2)Stepping up and moving in with the fiance! Spring is a time for romance, and moving.
3) Taking more time for me and doing what I want.
4)Vegas in November!!!! And who knows where else before that....
It's a time for reflection and I wanted to share mine. Tell me one good and one bad thing about 2006 for you. Or just say hi.
Happy Holidays to all and and to all a good night.